Cool Fantasy Football Team Names

1940_helmet_2One of the first jobs you’re tasked with when you begin playing fantasy football is coming up with a cool sounding team name for your franchise.  This is not a responsibility to be taken lightly.  The name you choose will identify you.  Just as some Native American tribes give names to individuals that reflect their spirit, your team name should be a reflection on you and your personality.  As such, it requires some goldarned serious consideration.

When you choose your team name, take a tip from the pros. NFL teams did not choose their names on a whim.  Instead, most have ties with their location.  For instance, the Baltimore Ravens named their team after the famous poem, The Raven, by Edgar Allen Poe.  The reason: Poe lived a big part of his life in Baltimore, and he died and was buried there.  Minnesota was given the moniker Vikings because of the many Scandinavian descendants living in the area.  You should follow suit and tie your franchise name to yourself in much the same way.

How do you come up with a name that is a reflection on you?  Take a notepad and start writing down some of your main interests, hobbies, and personality traits.  You could also take into account what you do for a living, or perhaps your ancestry.  The sky’s the limit to qualities that define you.  Just jot down things as they come to you.  Once you get a good list, whittle it down until you have a couple of traits that best define you.  The name I chose for my first fantasy football team was Ironhawks.  It combined two of my interests: Pumping iron, and attracting wild birds to my backyard.  Granted, my bird feeders did not invite many hawks, but hawks are nonetheless birds – and Ironfinches was a bit on the wimpy side!

Having your team name connect with you in some way is important, but there are times when you’ll come up with a name that doesn’t directly correlate with you, yet is so freaking cool it transcends all other considerations.  Should you find yourself in that situation, consider yourself lucky, and run with it.  The justification is that the name still reflects on you in terms of your creativity and originality.

When you choose a fantasy football team name, there’s really only one main theme to consider: War.  Football is a metaphor of war.  Think about it.  Just as in battle, there are two opposing sides.  Each side defends their own territory, and the team that can consistently invade deepest into the enemy’s dominion will win the war.  With that in mind, there are two routes to follow.

The first route is to give your fantasy football team a tough sounding or intimidating name.  It should be a name that suggests dominance and power.  Weakness and humility have a place in religion and philosophy, but not in football.  Teams that can pound and pummel their opponent definitely have the greatest chance for victory.  Football is not for the meek, and your team name should reflect that.

You may, however, wish to follow a second path.  That is the funny route.  You’ll still want to observe a theme of war, but if you go with humor, your team name will mock it.  For example, names such as Skinny Ballerinas or Garden Hoses might be overkill on the concept, but you get the point.  You’d hardly ever want to head into battle with a ballerina or garden hose, and that’s what makes it funny.

Regardless, a bonus is to make your name clever and unique.  This is done through word play.  There’s a multitude of techniques you can try.  Have you ever heard of an ananym?  That’s where you spell a word in reverse.  A cool example is an airplane called a CitabriaCitabria spelled backwards is Airbatic, which reflects the acrobatic stresses the plane is designed to withstand.  How about an oxymoron?  That’s where you have two words that contradict each other.  Controlled Chaos and Hot Ice are a couple of examples.  Puns are good as well.  If you’re a chicken farmer, Poultry in Motion might be a name to consider.  Are you in the ministry?  Altar Egos might work for you.

Another method for choosing a fantasy football team name is to use an online ‘team name generator’.  These are a lot of fun and can give you some great ideas – select ‘Team Name Generator’ from the menu above, or click HERE for Football Weblog’s version – but I would suggest that you use your own resourcefulness to come up with an original team name.

Keep your name clean.  Lewd jokes and cuss words have their place, but should not be part of fantasy football.  Even if you have no problem with a trashy name and think it comical, it may make others in your league uncomfortable.  Your team name should be one that wouldn’t create an awkward silence if your grandma heard it – assuming she’s not a perverted and spits tobacco.  Further, filthy team names can cause problems with spam filters by rejecting emails that contain the bad words.  Even relatively mild terms can cause issues.  I recently played in a league with a guy that called his team the Fightin’ Pussycats.  He was forced to substitute dollar signs for the S’s (Pu$$ycats) to prevent his emails from bouncing.  So save yourself the hassle and heartache by keeping your name unsullied.

Would you like to add an aura of nobility and grandeur to a team name?  Consider using some ‘olde world’ titles.  Dukes of Doom, Dagger Lords, and Knights of Siege are a few examples.

Combining an adjective with a noun is a good way to concoct a solid team name.  An adjective, as you may know, is a word that describes something.  Mighty, Red, and Stalwart are examples of adjectives.  Nouns, on the other hand, are people, places, animals, or things.  Savages, Tomahawks, and Leopards are all nouns.  Red Tomahawks or Mighty Leopards are two examples of team names created by combining an adjective with a noun.  It’s also a good way to come up with humorous, burlesque-like names if the two words are ludicrously opposed to one another.  Furry Tomahawks, or Mighty EarthWorms fall into that category.

If you want to be inspired with some seriously awesome names that would work wonderfully for fantasy football, do a quick search for British aircraft.  Their names are a smorgasbord of brilliance.  Among the list you’ll find classic names like the Bullfinch, Gorcock, Spitfire, and Helldiver.  Maybe it’s just me, but some of those names come close to giving me goosebumps.  I love ’em!

The last tip I want to send your way is to keep your name short.  If you find yourself hemming and hawing between two or three names, let the length of the name be the deciding factor.  All things being otherwise equal, the shorter name is the one you should run with.

Hopefully I’ve given you some ideas and tips that will help you choose the perfect name for your team.  Just remember that when you’re choosing a name, find one that is a reflection on you.  Also, bear in mind that football is a war simulation, and as such, your name should conform to that notion.  And finally, try to find a name that is clever and unique, yet clean.

So what is the name of your fantasy football team?  Leave a comment and let everyone know.  It would be fun to see what others have come up with.

As always, run to daylight.
~Randy

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